am I naive?????????

[Pete Mitchell]

Is dog training just about money and/or ego. Am I naive to think that people can share ideas, be friends, and help each other improve?

I am not talking about anything I may see or not see on this forum. I am talking about my own situation. I have been training with a group of people for many years. I consider them to be my very best friends. The two guys that started the club(and who I have learned most of what I know from) split a couple of years ago. When the split actually occured, I was in the police academy and had my own things going. Then my dog died and I did not really want to train for a while. Then one of my friends moved quite a distance away. Things happen and things change.

I have always been kind of "in the middle" of these two camps because I was the main training decoy. When we were a team; we won competitions and titled many dogs. Since the split, and I have not really trained, not only have these now different "teams" not won a competition, they have not even achieved a new or higher title.

I trained with one friend over the summer but his main goals are not about winning competitions or titles. The other friend is mad and thinks I "betrayed" him by training with the other over the summer. Both groups were threatened because I wanted to "push the envelope" and try new ideas and techniques.

Now these guys are realizing they are not as good separate as they were together, and they need each other to balance out. I did not pick sides and just wanted to keep the "team" together and now I am the bad guy, and? now i am the one on the outside. Of course I bear some responsibility. I can be cocky, outspoken, and throw opinions out there and that pisses some people off.

Anyway, I guess this is not an uncommon situation in the dog world. It is the first time it has happened to me. Am I taking this to personally? Do I just say "So be it."and move on? Am I naive to think that dog training can be about people working together towards a common goal, pushing each other to become better, and just having fun doing an activity we enjoy? Is dog training just a business now and relationships should be treated as business relationships? What do you all think?

Thanks for letting me vent,

Christian

[Raven]

Hi!

Like all of us learned sooner or later dog world (no mather show, work,..) is one of worst. You meet tons of people and all of them have different ideas and motives.

I met a lot of people since BW started and I am really happy to have met most of them. I personaly have no problem with people whether they like me or not.. I try to understand and have patience..

^{(here I must add one thing that I also learned along the way on forum: Martine (working malinois) has biggest patience and is one of calmest people I ever read or talked to.)}

...well anyway, I try to accept other people?s thinking or at least understand why is something the way it is. People have to accept that when they are trying fiercly to convience someone of their own right they just push them further away. Some people surprised me, in a bad way but I say f*ck them and move on. Some are just totaly?

In my opinion it all comes down to who you are as a person. Dog world can give you great friends or it will give you biggest trash you could ever find.

This is more or less introduction to dog world..?

About your thing..

Well I don?t know how it all played out but usually beeing in middle is not too smart thing since the middle guy always gets the heat. Probably they need someone to blame about their problems so this is you in this case.

Some people are your friends as long as you agree with them, support them and so on. When you try to tell them they are wrong you are the bad guy. Some will just wan?t to use you for what they want and than throw you away like trash. We are in age of internet and people maybe don?t get this but a kennel name, breeder, trainer, decoy, dogs or anything else regarding dogs can be destroyed by couple people campaging, spreding lies and so on.

Look at it this way, you maybe lost 2 "friends" but learned a valuable lesson for next time something like this could happen.

People will always be people, good or bad..

All of the above is my opinion and I don?t know your friends, how it all played out or how it ended so don?t grab me by my toung and pull me all over forum with this.? ?

Bye, Raven

[Jeff Oehlsen]

When you are training with people, you have to give them a break. They are dog people and have a really stupid outlook, and really high expectations of people. I deal with this at my club sometimes. I have egos to keep in check so my dog doesn't get broken, egos to stroke so that I can get help with things when I need them, egos to stroke when someone has worked their butt off with a dog that has issues that pop up before the trial ect ect. This is sooooo the dog world.
    Look at the show people. Can't explain why they want dogs that don't work.
    Look at the working people. Can't deal with the show people. Look at some of these boards where people get all defensive and pissy knowing that the typed word doesn't reflect what people want to say, or how they are saying it.

I just roll with it all. And like you, occasionally I vent like a MFer. All Good

[malndobe]

I've dealt with this same issue, a couple of times now.  IMO it shows you who really is a FRIEND and who is just a dog training buddy.  In my case I was lucky, the people in question were dog training buddies to each other, but true friends to me and we were able to work things out. 

There are plenty of clubs out there who are always looking for decoys.  Finding a new "home" shouldn't be to difficult.

For some people the dogs are all about money and/or ego.  For others it's just something fun to do with their dogs.  And for others, it's somewhere in the middle.  Unfortunately clubs seem to come and go, people "mature" and want to strike off on their own, they learn new training styles that aren't compatible with the current club style, etc.  It's the nature of the game, IMO the best you can hope for is a "friendly break up" where people go their own way, but stay friendly with each other.

Kadi

[chuck]

This has happened at all three clubs I have been involved with in the past 10 years.  Dog people (sigh).  Just look at any working dog board, strong opinions and personalities are common.

[Pete Mitchell]

Well guys thanks for the imput and to those who sent me PM's on this subjuect. I was really using this as an opportunity to vent.

Raven-don't worry, none of the people in these clubs are on this board,That I know of, if they are and they can figure out who I am and recognize the situation, they already know. I am not looking to bash anyone. I used no names so should not be a problem.

Anyway, it is nice to hear I am not the only one who has been in this position.

Take care,

     Christian